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30 May 2011

Cloverfield (2007)

I came into Cloverfield with a clean sheet. All I knew was that it was apocalyptic and involved some sort of invasion of Earth. This information was gleaned from the DVD cover alone. You'd think that the film would be right up my street...

Well think again...

I'm not going to beat about the bush: This film would have been great if it had had a story. The film makers obviously felt that less would be more and have gone to great pains to hide much of the background of what is happening and why. It's a shame really, because the special effects are outstanding. All you get are strands of a plot that struggles to carry you through the journey. I'm still not sure what Cloverfield stands for. I'm guessing that it was the military name for 'the Event'. Must... pay... more... attention...

So, what's it all about?

Well on the one hand, this guy's leaving. He's landed this high-powered job in Japan and his friends are sending him off in style with a drunken party. Cue a long-winded study of said party where we discover that he's done the dirty with an old friend, and as a result is now realising that he's in love with her. Only, he's leaving for Japan! Oh dear. I thought the party was never going to end. And we learn all this exciting information via a camcorder in shakey little snippets. Yep... it's another one of those first-person affairs! The novelty wore off for me after the first 2 seconds. I'll be in the kitchen...

Back to the plot...

On the other hand, it's the end of the world... or at least the end of New York City, as aliens invade. The initial attack is powerful with buildings toppling and panic on the streets, and this is probably the best bit of the whole film. All I know about the invasion is that there's this giant alien and a handful of little Starship Trooper-like aliens. Unfortunately, the big alien doesn't appear to have much of a game plan and when we do finally get to see it, the poor thing looks confused. Join the club!

So, I'm not a fan of the film.

If you like special effects then this is worth a watch. If you want a bit of meat in your casserole, then you might want to give it a miss. I found the story flimsy and the ending is oh so poor. But wait a minute... the Daily Star really rates this film: "10/10 Not to be missed". Surely they couldn't be talking out of their arses again? 'Fraid so...

[Update: Apparently I a-know-a-nothing! This film was intentionally vague and was created by the same people who made Lost... another royal waste of time. And it wasn't aliens, but a sea creature and its parasites wreaking havoc, perhaps released as a result of deep-sea drilling by the Japanese company that the "star" was going to work for. Only, it doesn't tell you any of that in the film. Secrets, secrets. You've got to search out the facts on t'internet. Yawn. I'm not changing my score...]

On the Triple-B I'm going to tell you 3 facts about this film and you can guess the rest. Hey mate... can you spare me 40p for my bus-fare home?

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